Daily Archives: July 21, 2016


Scientific study finds alcohol users to be aggressive and warlike

by Patrick Devlin

Scientists in New Zealand were amazed to find out that the common sense real-life truism that is shared by millions of human beings, that drunk humans are irrationally combative and respond to situations by lashing out with unconsidered aggressive actions, is more than simple experiential conjecture and is in fact scientifically demonstrable.


Study subjects who were plied with liquor were given a battery of tests to determine their level of aggressiveness. The scientists discovered the drunk participants’ actions were characterized by observable ill-considered and uncontrolled aggressive asshole-ness.

Additionally, and importantly, the doctors found that when these same study participants were given the same battery of tests when they were not pie-eyed, the subjects refrained from aggressive attacking and became more cooperative and welcoming, more thoughtful and pleasant.

A control group of participants who did not use alcohol did not exhibit the unreasoned attacking aggressive attitudes that the booze-infused participants displayed, suggesting that it was the alcohol consumption itself that caused the unhelpful and disturbing aggressive behaviors.

Interestingly, and providing a measure of hope for our alcohol addled society, another group of participants were given cannabis before they were tested and the researchers reported that cannabis users responded in a more cooperative and peaceable way. Further, the scientists discovered that when the cannabis using group performed the battery of tests while they were not high, they responded less cooperatively and were less accommodating, suggesting that using cannabis makes one more non-aggressive, amiable and nonbelligerent.

The scientists who conducted the study reported their findings succinctly:

“It is concluded that alcohol facilitates feelings of aggression whereas cannabis diminished aggressive feelings.”

The study’s findings could mark a watershed moment in America, a country that spends billions every year encouraging, glorifying, and mythologizing both alcohol use and uncontrolled aggression, by pointing to a pathway through which citizens can move beyond booze fueled violence – the pathway, cannabis use.

“Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction.”
Bob Marley